Updated: Jun 29, 2020
In pursuit of my authentic self and true happiness, it was time to take action. I threw away all the rules of society that my brain collected over time. I needed to release the chains holding me back like forgiving people I felt wronged by, and redefine how I looked at success. It was a tall and intimidating list, and fortunately by this time, I had surrounded myself with an amazing support system of family and friends. I was not alone in this journey!
It always seems impossible until it’s done. ― Nelson Mandela
Today, being your true self is brave. From the as long as I can remember, society has always painted a picture of who I should be. Then came social media and it made the big world feel so much smaller, and more connected than I could ever imagine.
Over the years society has provided a perfect distraction resulting in an endless list of wants and wishes that I believed I needed.
Looking back, I realized that I was so wrapped up in keeping up with people around me that I settled for an environment that did not reflect my true self. Throwing away the guidelines of society I was organically exposed to over time, I began asking questions and soul searching.
Time is priceless and irreplaceable. I can’t change the past, however, I can revaluate howto live the time I have left. Stopping to hit reset on my life lifted the fog so I could clearly evaluate my current environment. Then one by one I released the chains that were holding me back from pursuing my best life. Revaluating my dreams, goals, and ambitions in life. Opening up my heart to be rediscovered by me.
Rediscovering me has been a process that I chose not to do on my own. I decided to take advantage of my resources and ask for help from my incredible support system. For months I seeked out guidance from a life coach, fitness coach, family, friends, and complete strangers. It's was an inspiring experience.
Take chances, make mistakes. That's how you grow. Pain nourishes your courage. You have to fail in order to practice being brave. ― Mary Tyler Moore
Cutting the Chains
We all have chains, in other words responsibilities. Over time we slowly acquire them,and they eventually turn into a never-ending checklist in our brains.
Over the course of a few months,I came to the realization that I had too many chains weighing me down, preventing me from living my most authentic life.
I made a list of my responsibilities. Then separated them into two buckets.
Tasks that I had to do like cut the grass, pay the light bill, laundry, grocery shopping, working
out, and etc.
Tasks I assume responsibility for. Things that I felt an obligation to do because I didn’t have the
heart to say no. We have all volunteered to babysit, make a Target run, grab lunch for the
team, or drive a friend or family to an appointment.
I went through this list and analyzed every task.
I started to notice a pattern; I was spending a lot of time on things that didn’t contribute to my overall happiness or dreams. My biggest chain holding me back was my newly purchased home.
I bought a brand new custom built four-bedroom house. I handpicked and designed every piece of furniture, light fixture and doorknob. In addition, over time, I had acquired so many kitchen gadgets, clothes, shoes.......you know...... just stuff. Fifteen plus years of junk!
One by one I sold about 85% of my things. It was therapeutic and upsetting. I realized I was buying stuff to makeup for the happiness I lacked in my life.
Nordstrom and Anthropology became my asporin for my bad days. Junk food and Netflix also did the trick.
The process of selling my things made me realize that other people didn’t value my home or belonging as much as I did was humbling. It was eye opening becoming aware of how much value I placed on my materialistic possessions.
Money can't buy happiness, but it can make you awfully comfortable while you're being miserable. ― Clare Boothe Luce
It was painful letting go of my belongings and upsetting realizing that I had limited my self worth to these materialistic things. At the end, I felt like I completed a huge milestone in my road to living my best life.
You can only become truly accomplished at something you love. Don’t make money your goal. Instead pursue the things you love doing and then do them so well that people can’t take their eyes off of you. ― Maya Angelou
Money and status have been my driving force professional for a long time. I longed to move up the corporate ladder my whole career. I followed the process that I thought I was supposed to follow.
Get a good job.....make money......buy a house....buy more fancy stuff....move up....make more money. Somewhere in there I was suppose to fall in love and have kids. I was too busy working to focus on that goal.
Throwing away the guidelines of society I was organically exposed to over time, I began asking questions and soul searching, redefine how I measured success.
What makes me happy? If money didn’t matter what would I do? How much of my time do I spend doing what others want me to do? What do I need? What fills my cup?
After many months, of conversations with family and friends I started to design my best life. This is what I came up with.
I want to travel the world and wwork remotely.
Help others live their best life by reignite their inner unicorn.
Create positive ripples and make a real impact in the world.
I did it! I dreamed bigger then made it happen. I punched my fears in the face in the process.
I'm unable to put into words how amazing it feels to be brave enough to be me. I have the headspace visualize the possibilities and act on them. I've reignited my inner unicorn and am living my best life.
To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all. ― Oscar Wilde